She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
