Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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