real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
