I hate all girls vehemently.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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