we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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