so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Randomize
