Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
