Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Randomize
