so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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