I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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