How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
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