I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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