Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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