Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
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