lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Randomize
