i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
It's never too late to be topless.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
