Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
