Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
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