Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
If I die, sorry about rent.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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