You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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