Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Randomize
