Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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