you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
