Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
