never play flip cup with pint glasses
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I'm passing your future prison.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Randomize
