THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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