I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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