I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
