By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
They took my balls.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize