I think I am morally bankrupt
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Randomize