is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
We were destined to go to rehab together
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize