she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
