I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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