So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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