okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
