i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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