Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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