Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
