Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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