its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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