His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
