whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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