Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
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