you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
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