How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
