I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
