What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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