Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
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