Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Randomize
