Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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